Trump Says He’s Not A King. So Why Worry?
The largest U.S. street protest in half a century took place in October when upwards of seven million people marched under the banner of “No Kings.”
“I’m not a king,” Donald Trump protested. Good to know.
But, if he were, how might a King Donald I rule?
We’re not talking here about ceremonial royalty maintained by Great Britain, the Netherlands and some other countries. No. Think in terms of old time kings, the ones the world finally rejected. The kings who answered to no one.
For instance, a modern king invested with absolute power might wake up in the morning and think, “Maybe we should invade Venezuela. Or, maybe not. I’ll let you know what I decide.”
Or, for another example, the 21st century king might not want certain subjects in his realm. He could just declare a crisis, suspend civil rights, hire some thugs to grab them off the streets and exile them.
The Rise of “No Kings” Protests
A king ruling with no restraints could feel disrespected by a TV commercial from a foreign country like Canada, for instance, and effectively cancel all trade.
Or, for that matter, he might declare a trade war with the world, friend and foe alike, seize emergency powers and tear up all existing treaties. Then he might demand that their leaders come to him and court his favor.
And if the king has such power, shouldn’t he be richly compensated? That’s the way it’s worked through the ages. For Chinese emperors. Persian shahs. Pharaohs. You name it.
So why not use your power to make deals that fill your personal coffers? There’s an art to making deals. Particularly if you have undisputed power to, for lack of a more congenial metaphor, break economic arms and legs at will.
What else might a king do?
He might declare a crime emergency and use military troops as his own personal militia to patrol city streets.
Education? History? He might warn schools, teachers, researchers and libraries to “align” with the king’s views or lose the king’s favor. Maybe a “Thoughts of King Donald” book might be in order, like the one Mao tse-tung forced everyone to read decades ago.
Signs of a Modern King in Politics
Well, enough of this fantasy. This isn’t the middle ages. We’re not in ancient Egypt or Caesar’s Rome. There would be restraints on a modern king. A Congress. A legal system. Even popular elections. And they all must be respected.
Except, if they’re rigged.
And rigging, of course, is one of the most serious problems we face today.
The elections are rigged. The courts are rigged. The media is rigged. Even the government the king might preside over is rigged. In Trump’s America, radical lunatics and their conspiracies are everywhere.
That’s why the king would need ultimate and unchallenged authority. Especially from a compliant Congress. Otherwise there would be economic chaos, uncertain allies, questionable justice.
But don’t be concerned. Donald Trump says he’s not a king. This little movie he posted on his website featuring an image of himself as a jet fighter pilot, wearing a king’s crown and doing a toilet dump on his protesting subjects is just a joke, he says. So was the “long live the king” faux Time magazine cover he created. The one reproduced at the top of this article.
Trump’s just a funny guy.
Who could possibly think otherwise?
Here’s this week’s STEM Winder: A weekly look into the future.
Comments? Criticism? Contact Joe Rothstein at jrothstein@rothstein.net
Always Get It’s Always Something
Sign up to get the most recent column set to your inbox for free.
What happens when a fun-loving, charismatic, reform-minded Mexican-American billionairess becomes president of the United States and strikes fear in the pocketbooks of a cabal of the rich and powerful?